


Like Car-Keys in the Bathroom

by totalizzyness



Series: 00Q Prompts [27]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
Genre: Established Relationship, Humour, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-27
Updated: 2013-01-27
Packaged: 2017-11-27 04:17:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/657942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/totalizzyness/pseuds/totalizzyness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>First "I love yous," bonus if it's not immediately reciprocated.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like Car-Keys in the Bathroom

Q desperately wished he had a secret place he could hide away, preferably somewhere with wi-fi. All his old secret places were no longer secret, no thanks to eternal life-ruiner: James Bond. His need for a hideout was also, not surprisingly, Bond’s fault.  
  
In retrospect, Q knew he should have just kept his mouth shut, or learnt to reign in his instinct to blurt out the first thing on his mind during awkward silences, but who seriously replied to ‘I love you’ with ‘Oh… Thanks’?   
  
He didn’t think it could have gotten worse, but the pitying look he’d also gotten definitely made him feel like crap. He’d made a hasty excuse, explaining he had ‘things to do that aren’t here’ and ran off, mentally kicking himself for the ‘I love you’ cock-up and the ridiculous excuse he’d given.   
  
Normally, people who’d found themselves in an uncomfortable situation were left alone to curl up alone in a dark room and cry, but Q knew Bond was looking for him, actively seeking him out, so now whilst he desperately wanted to find a safe place to hide away in until the end of time, Q found himself playing an elaborate game of cat and mouse.   
  
Bond was unrelenting in his search for Q, starting with the least obvious places his quartermaster would be, because when he didn’t want to be found, finding Q was like finding the car keys, and honestly, who leaves car keys in the bathroom? He asked around everyone who knew Q, ordering them to contact him if he was seen. He went to all of Q’s usual hideouts, and all of the ones Q didn’t know he knew about.  
  
Q desperately wished he wasn’t afraid of flying, or that he didn’t have to be back in work by four, because hiding out in rural Russia seemed like a fantastic idea, and he wouldn’t have to subject himself to Starbucks’ sub-par, overpriced coffee, and the company of a gang of hipster girls squawking over the latest fashion trends. He knew Bond wouldn’t look for him in the Starbucks round the corner from the flat, he knew Bond knew his opinions on Starbucks, there was only one way “I would rather individually cut out every single bone from both of my feet with just a pair of tweezers than drink the cat piss they call coffee” could only be interpreted.  
  
Eventually, however, he knew he’d have to return to HQ, and Bond would find him there and things would be terrible. He’d already asked M if he could take three weeks off to go hide in a Tibetan monastery, to which M had given him his stern “I don’t have the time or patience to be dealing with your petty Bond problems, didn’t I warn you not to get involved?” look. Casting a glance to his watch, Q huffed a loud sigh and slipped down from his bar stool (in a coffee shop, seriously,) and stomped out onto the street, pulling his coat around him to shield him from the biting winter air.  
  
“So, how was your cat piss?”  
  
Q’s shoulders slumped, squeezing his eyes shut and taking a deep breath before turning around. “It was the only place I thought you wouldn’t find me.”  
  
Bond smiled softly, folding his hands into his trouser pockets. “I almost didn’t, I just spotted you leaving.”  
  
“Well, I have to get back to work.”  
  
“Q… You’re a bit of an idiot, aren’t you.”  
  
Q glared. “I’m leaving now.”  
  
Bond jumped forward, grabbing Q by his shoulders and pushing him backwards until he was against a brick wall. “Q, stop running from me.”  
  
“You run from things all the time.”  
  
“Come on, it wasn’t that bad.”  
  
“I told you I loved you. You thanked me!”  
  
Bond smiled sheepishly. “You caught me off guard.”  
  
“Oh I’m sorry, I’m sure you’ve had enough time to come up with a witty response, though. Go ahead.”  
  
“I love you too.”  
  
Q said nothing, staring up at Bond blankly. “…Excuse me?”  
  
“I love you too; you fucking idiot.”  
  
It took a few moments, but Q finally found his sharp tongue. “That’s the worst love confession I’ve ever heard.”  
  
Bond grinned. “Well the one I’ve recently received wasn’t much better. Although the elaborate game of hide-and-seek was… different. I liked it.”  
  
“Will you stop talking please, and kiss me?”  
  
“Don’t mind if I do.”

**Author's Note:**

> Also available on my Tumblr; [[link](http://the-nerdinator.tumblr.com/post/41633065357/q-desperately-wished-he-had-a-secret-place-he)]


End file.
